Monday, September 10, 2012

Things I Whisper-Sing to Myself in Public

Confession time!

"Why isn't this enjoyable?"  I whispered this question to myself in public many times this weekend as I walked... and walked... and walked.  Through a mall.  (I'll give you ladies a moment to pick up your jaws from the floor.)  Who am I, right?

Friends, I become a pathetic excuse of a person when I know I have to go to the mall.  It's true.  I was not made for shopping.  (My closet sighs.)  If I go for anything more than buying a gift card or walking around aimlessly with a friend, I put it off.  I smile and say in my best childish whine to Mr. TBS, "I don't want to goooooo."  He replies with an amused, "I don't blame you."  I always do the same song and dance -- begrudgingly sauntering around the house to get ready.  Shoulders hunched forwarded, arms dangling, chin jutted forwarded, puppy dog eyes.  He smiles and hugs me.

"Have fun!"

"Okaaaaay."  And then I'm out the door.

To give you some insight into how I approach a trip to the mall, I'll explain how I "prepared" on Friday night.

- I wrote down every store I wanted to go to and which mall zone it was listed under.
- I looked up the mall hours to make sure I got there within the first hour.
- I quickly browsed store websites and made note of the things I wanted to try on.

(Now that I'm writing this out, I realize how neurotic this sounds!)  I like browsing through stores if I have Starbucks in hand and I'm only there to hang out with someone.  However, I like to get in and out of stores when I'm there to actually try on and buy clothes.  There is no thrill in the hunt for me, you guys.  I wish there was!  I like to walk into neatly organized stores where everything is displayed nicely, so I can quickly scan the room, grab what pleases my eye, and move the heck on!  

I survived the mall by humming songs to myself and whisper-singing the following to myself:

"Whyyyyy is this not fuuuuun for me?"
"Are you freaking kidding me right now?"
"Make it stop."
"I like you! ... Not $125-like you."
"Dear God, please make this fun for me."

I am almost positive that a few people heard me.  Well, not only did I survive a full 4.5 hours of independent shopping, but I have successfully spruced up my wardrobe!  Because my company has strict attire guidelines, they provide annual corporate attire money.  (Cha-ching!)  Lucky for me, my boss does not care a lick about the color rules, so I made some colorful purchases.  :)  I also felt really fancy when I purchased my first pair of Michael Kors heels!

Other weekend finds include the elusive mason jar stamp (which has only been available on eBay until I nabbed the only one at Michael's) and ridiculously yummy tea.

How was your weekend?
Does anyone else out there dread shopping like me?


Rhiannon said...

I am like you. I really don't like shopping at all. It frustrates me!

Unknown said...

I swing from one extreme to the other, sometimes loving shopping (although that's only really ever in flea markets or charity shops where it feels more like treasure hunting) and then hating it. I have to go with my husband so he can keep feeding me encouragment! Well done on getting it done though - at least you won't have to go again for a while!

Tyler said...

Put me in a craft store I am totally fine! But I'm so with you on clothes shopping, I really am not crazy about it.

Gesci said...

I hate clothes shopping. Hate hate hate hate hate.
And I refuse to step foot in a mall, other than to get a Great American Cookie Company slice and an Icee. I prefer small boutiques and little shops- but every now and then I end up having to go to Macy's or something similar, and I remember how bad it is.
Oh- I totally do the "I like you, but I don't $30 like you"- my fanciness doesn't even get into the $125 range! If I pick something up with that price tag I drop it fast before anyone sees that I'm touched it with my cheap-o hands! :)

Unpublished Life said...

I need to be in the mood to shop before I tackle shopping, especially clothes shopping. I usually get what I like to call "the itch" once every 3 or 4 months and then I plan my route in my head and dedicate 4 hours to shopping for clothes.

It's all a bit chaotic, and I usually get very hot and bothered and stressed, but always treat myself to dinner afterwards to make myself feel better!

You are not alone!

Empirically Erin said...

I love shopping as long as it's for me and by myself. I hate following someone around (especially my sister) while they shop. I usually hit a wall at some point where I don't want to shop anymore and I like to be able to just leave whenever I hit that wall!

Steph said...

I like to shop alone best, and I plan out just like you! I go online first and only go in the stores I know I will find something. I am just too indecisive to drag people along with me haha.

Domesticable said...

Cute shoes! I shop alone because I'm so indecisive!


Bre said...

I hate shopping for clothes for myself. That's why all my clothes look the same. I go to Old Navy and The Gap and do a quick once over and grab stuff that looks like stuff I already have and I'm out. I avoid it on the weekends. I don't try clothes on lol.
But the bookstore?! You can't drag me out of there.

Darby Hawley said...

I can't tell you what I'm more shocked about: your distaste for personal shopping or money from your work for clothes?! haha You did well though and I'm very impressed! I've got to do some sprucing up too, and I'm dreading it too boooooo!

Myra said...

Eeek! We are the same person. I hate shopping. Hate.It. I walk around the same way as you, pouting & frowning about it. At least we feel a little better after we get to look at our pretty new clothes.

Hope you have a fabulous Monday!

RadiantKristen said...

Shopping is hard! I can last 45 minutes before I'm over it. Even if I have a plan, that's pretty much my upper limit.

Your company gives you money for clothes??? I wanna come work with you!

Anonymous said...

What job do you work at, where they give you money for clothes?! Haha! I think I could learn to enjoy shopping if I didn't have to spend the only extra money I have... I've never really enjoyed it much, although I do get very excited when I actually find something that I like and looks good on me... It just doesn't happen. Which is why my closet/wardrobe is so boring.
I love your black shoes! They're really cute! :)


Nadine said...

I don't know if I've ever heard of a company that restricts color. How surprising! I'm glad you resist. Color makes dressing up more fun! Also, I feel like this is happening to me too as I get older. I'm always like, oh my gosh why is it so crowded. Two minutes in a store like Forever 21 and I'm overwhelmed and I leave. I think it will just get worse until I only shop at Target haha. Cause Target is always fun, no matter what.

Unknown said...

I also dread shopping, I do most of mine online. Every once in while I'll be in the mood to shop, but that doesn't last very long! I usually hate dressing rooms too- so I typically will take home to try on and decide if it will be a return or not. This makes no sense to my boyfriend. lol.

Glad you had a great weekend! It's awesome that your company gives you $ for clothes though! What a great thought!

Nilda said...

I wish I could commiserate (because my wallet would love me) but I can't. I adore shopping. I love trying things and finding a deal. It's a weakness really, so be glad you're not like that!

Unknown said...

OMG girl! You are too funny! I love that you were humming to yourself to get some motivation! I too say "I Like you... not $125 like you!"


Megan G. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Megan G. said...

Oh my gosh, that tea looks super delicious. I'm going on the hunt and getting myself some ASAP!

You bought so many cute things and such cute shoes! You have such an awesome taste in clothes. :)

tara said...


Michelle said...

SOO jealous your company gives you clothes money!! But I would not enjoy a strict dress code.

I have mixed emotions about shopping. I love it as long as I'm in the right mood for it. If I'm shopping for jeans or a bathing suit I'm immediately stressed out and angry and bracing myself for dressing room meltdowns. It all depends :) And I'm picky because I refuse to pay what most stores charge. A shirt does NOT need to be $50!

That tea looks amazing!! Where did you get it?

Courtney said...

1. I want to work where you do so I can get $ for clothes!

2. I actually despise shopping. I don't think I can put together cute outfits, I don't like how things fit on me and I have no $ to spend haha. My bf usually can tell when I'm done shopping because I basically look like I'm gonna cry. I'd much rather pick out things for my bf to wear because he looks great in everything. If I have to go shopping, I never go by myself because I can't make decisions worth a darn!

3. Love those MK heels!

The Mrs. and The Momma said...

I actually can't relate to this at all.....I love shopping! Have you even been to a CAbi party? They come out with two lines a year (fall/spring) and you can try on clothes in your home. Just a suggestion if you abhore the mall.

And that stamp is amazing! So cute! How are you going to use it?

The Mrs. and The Momma

Emily @ Emmy June said...

Oh girl...just another reason we're bbffs :) I'm really not a shopper either. Especially not at malls. And ESPECIALLY not when I'm under pressure to buy things! Haha.

<3<3 you!!!

Whitney said...

Bahhhhh you were supposed to call me! I could make it interesting, I promise =P