Tuesday, March 13, 2012

What Blogging Has Taught Me About Online Dating

We've all heard it before.  Love makes the world go 'round.  But I'm beginning to think technology makes the world go 'round.  It's become more and more common that people find love on the internet.  Do you remember when meeting someone online was taboo, a secret, and only spoken of when news stations warned women of the dangers of chat rooms?  As a teenager who loved Datline, 20/20, and 60 Minutes, I heard that message all the time.

Years later, dating websites like Match.com and eHarmony boomed.  I knew a lot of people who had profiles and went on dates, and I supported them as long as they were safe about meting these strangers, but I still didn't really get it.   

How could they possibly feel a connection with someone online.  
It's not like they can actually talk, so how does that work?
Isn't it awkward?

Well, welcome to 2012!  I'm officially convinced that people can genuinely connect over the internet.  I am six weeks into writing Trial By Sapphire, and I've connected... with more than one person!  No, not a romantic connection but a heartfelt "we need to be friends in real life (IRL) right now" connection.  I think that social media and the internet are so prominent in our culture that it's so much more likely to happen now.  

There are so many inspiring and talented people that I want to meet IRL, but there are four that I e-mail with (at length!) almost daily.  If I had trading cards for my blog loves, they would read something like this:

NAME: Emily (& her smarty-pants husband)
STATUS: Blog BFF (BBFF) & Blog Soulmate (BSM)
MATCH FACTOR: I don't remember exactly how we "met," (Em, do you?) but we clicked.  I think we connected over vegetarianism, our independence (need to question everything), sass, and optimism.  She's awesome.  You need to know her.

NAME: Jessica
STATUS: Partner & Mentor
MATCH FACTOR: She was the first blogger I reached out to when I started, and she is just as ultra sweet, ambitious, helpful, and giving as she appears on her blog.  I adore this girl!

NAME: Jamie
BLOG: The Letter 4, written by Jamie and her three sisters
STATUS: Role Model Turned Pen Pal
MATCH FACTOR: I started as a first-class blog stalker and serial commenter, but that has turned into the most hilarious e-mail conversations. And I still need to record my audition video to be her daughter's singing nanny.  (Just kidding... or am I?)

NAME: Bobbi-Jo
STATUS: I'm her (faux) Life Coach.  ;-)
MATCH FACTOR: My most recent match! I found her through Emmy June..., and she has been so helpful and supportive of TBS.  Bobbi-Jo, you are too wonderful!

So there you have it.  I get it now!  Online dating websites, I understand you a bit better now!

Have you ever tried online dating?
Do you have blog friends you would love to meet in real life?
Do I sound crazy obsessed with the talented ladies above?  I don't care.  :-)


Jamie said...

Day made. Oh my heck I don't think I've ever been more happy or proud to be mentioned in a post! I'm so glad we met and you're not joking about the audition tape! I need it stat! <3 you!!!

Ellie said...

I tired online dating for years and HATED it. I never felt a connection with people. I made a few friends, but they have all fizzled out of my life at this point. But, I also have the feeling that I am going to meet my future husband after knowing him for a while as friends....Sometimes when I'm lonely I think about going back on to the online dating scene, but then I remember how icky it feels and nix the idea.

Unknown said...

Sarah from Moske Monkey Business met her husband through online dating! They are an amazing couple! :)

Lisa @ MMT said...

This post was funny! You are so cute! Glad you made such good connections online. I, for one, am so glad you are blogging ;)

Miki {Becoming What I Always Was} said...

This explains my mentality exactly! I seriously never got the whole online thing. I started to get it a little more when I got into facebook, because you can keep a relationship with a good friend who's moved away with photos and writing on their wall, but blogging is a whole other online animal. I get so connected to my favorite blogs. I seriously feel like if I saw them at the mall then I'd be able to go play a prank on them, were that close, but I've never met them!

Whitney said...

I totally feel just like you do! I'm meeting a blogger for the first time today and I'm so excited! I'd love to meet lots of other Houston blog ladies!

Jess said...

You were so right - I DO love this :)
I am seriously sitting in my apartment cracking up.

I am so honored to have my very own trading card ;)

And I never really thought about linking blogging to trying to understand online dating...! UM DUH. Guess I can't make fun of online dating anymore can I? Just kidddding. YAY for online relationships of any kind!

I totally need to meet you, Meg, Emma and a few other IRL asap! NOT KIDDING. So let's make this happen, k? How about when I [finally] get engaged, you all make a trip to FL for my wedding? Okay it's settled then. :)

Hope you enjoyed this novel of a comment!

xo as always

Amira said...

You make a great point! I feel like I've connected with so many wonderful ladies through the blogging world! It does give me a different perspective on online dating :-) My best friend met her current boyfriend online, and he is one of the most genuine guys she's ever dated :-)

Jami said...

I met my husband on Craigslist, yep, Craigslist. We bonded over our love of baseball and the rest is history. I know a quite a few married couples that met through various dating sites and I can say with assurance, although it may not be for everyone, it works!

Lot said...

what a fantastic post. You really know how to write great content. I sometimes don't like calling friends I meet through blogging 'blog pals' because they really feel like more than that, like any other friend really.

The Arizona Russums said...

YES! I love my blog friends turned face to face friends and hope to meet lots more of them in the future!I hope you get to meet some of yours soon!

Ashley said...

I met my husband online and have met one of my blog friends offline as well. :) I truly to think that it's much easier to connect with people online sometimes!

ashley / afterninetofive.net

Allie said...

Haha I totally understand how you didn't get the idea of online dating. I actually never did the online dating thing but a lot of the best friends i have, i met online. I have one friend I've known since I was 15 when we met through an online writing community and I've met two others through that as well. And have kept in touch through texting and skype with those I haven't met but are some of the best friends I have. I always felt out of place where I lived so I figured there must be people I could connect with in other parts of the world and it definitely worked out that way. Especially for introverts, it's sometimes just easier to be yourself and connect on a deeper level when there isn't the anxiety of meeting in person and making the awkward small talk and everything.

Breanna said...

This is an adorable post! :) Everything about it makes me smile! :) You are such an awesome Blog Friend! :)

Meg O. said...

Um, you must be a beast or something if you've accomplished all this from blogging for 6 weeks. It's taken me years!

Sarah Hartley said...

This is SUCH a cute post. And now I have new blogs to check out :) I can't believe the friendships that I've made through blogging. It's really such a great community.

Michelle said...

This is awesome!!! And hilarious! I never thought about it that way before! :)

Kerrie Williams said...

haha well I've never thought of it like that, but you're so right! Haha

Emily said...

I totally agree with this. I was a huge skeptic of internet relationships - but it's such an amazing tool that connects people that would not otherwise meet. I think our lives are all richer because of this. I have a similar type of post ready for my blogaversary at the end of the month giving a shout out to all the lovely peeps I have connected with during my first year of blogging. I am so happy you have been fortunate to connect with so many great ladies.

Megan said...

I am totally right there with you!! I met one of my BEST friends through blogging...she flew to see me all the way from California! Haha! I love it...and no one else really gets it!

Emily @ Emmy June said...

So, BBFF/BSM....

Can I just tell you that I had to leave the house very early this morning and, therefore, had ZERO blog time. Coming home to this post is AMAZING :)

And I have 5 new friends on my blog...thinking that's thanks to you!!!

We met through "The Girl Behind the Blog" vlog and you reached out (thank goodness, too, because I was in Thailand and when I got back, I only watched the vlogs of the girls who commented on mine. AKA...YOURS!

So Ashley was basically our matchmaker.

Love you!

Michelle @ The Vintage Apple said...

Blogging is SO AWESOME!!!!! The people we "meet" online and in real life are what make blogging so special!!!! So happy to have "met" you and we will meet IRL soon at the meetup!!!

bobbi said...

This is the best thing ever! You're the best life coach I could've hoped for! {please ignore that I'm up at 2:30am!!}

Holly said...

I totally agree! While I've never ventured into online dating there are a few gals I would just love to be able to spend time with in real life instead of just via Blogger and email.

Devon said...

You're so right, these days it has become so fun and easy to meet friends over the internet. Blogging has connected me to you and Emily and I am so stoked about it! I can't wait to check out these other blogs too.

Katherina said...

There are a lot of wonderful people that we might never meet without internet. It's really time to change that perception! Love this post! :))

Kristen Victoria said...

I was thinking the same thing the other day! It's kinda sad but my blogger friends know way more about my life than some of my IRL friends. I can't wait til I go to my first blogger convention and get to meet some of you beautiful ladies!

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