Monday, December 26, 2011

Eating My Feelings

Rough day.  

This morning's routine vet appointment led to a three-night hospitalization stay and possible dental surgery on Thursday for Tolly.

In brief, his blood work revealed that his kidneys are in very bad shape.  Also, he needs to have some teeth extracted, but with his current kidney condition, going under anesthesia could be potentially fatal for him.  Thus, he is spending the next few nights at the vet with an IV to see if anything improves by Thursday for possible surgery.  If his kidney enzymes remain the same, we need to look at what else we can do to keep him healthy.  The thought of leaving him there was gut-wrenching, but it is our best long-term option.  We took Amelie home and visited Tolly again before the office closed.  We'll be back to visit, separately and together, a few times a day.

Our pets are our family, and we treat them as such.  It felt no different than receiving bad news about a relative at a hospital.  We're exhausted.  I cried.  I became very angry at his past owners for their lack of attention to his health.  (The damage to his teeth is due to a long period of neglect/oversight.)  I took a nap.  I went to yoga to clear my head and realign (and it did help).  I ate my feelings in the form of spinach lasagna and peppermint ice cream.  I don't want to dwell on an unknown result or what could happen, because it would be as helpful as trying to self-diagnose yourself using WebMD and Google which usually results in thinking you have some form of cancer.  Our hearts are bruised to not have him home tonight, and we're nervous about what his hospital stay will reveal.  We wish we could talk to him and explain what is happening. 

Today I am thankful for Tolly, our first "little one" who joined our family three years and eight days ago.  (He was my Christmas surprise!) 

I'm going to miss this when I'm getting ready for work tomorrow morning:


Please send good vibes.  And if you have pets, hold them close and say "I love you."  They won't understand your words, but they'll understand what you mean.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Lindsay and Scott, I can only imagine what you two are feeling. I know that Tolly is family. And the rollercoaster ride of emotions is a tough one. He's in our prayers. Feel the love and support we send to Tolly and each of you. Dad

Anonymous said...

We are sending our best wishes to little Tolly for a speedy recovery. We know how much Tolly and Amelie mean to your family. They are your "kids", and you treat them with the same love and care as you would any other family member. I know we feel the same about Rocco. We love you all. Summ

Darkside213 said...

Praying..

Lindsay said...

Thanks, guys! We have our fingers crossed!

Anna {ramblyblog.com} said...

oh dear! hope that things are looking up!

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry to hear of Tolly's passing. Our Chewy left us with the same situation. Chewy was one our first pets for Fred & I - 17.5 years with her. Tolly was a very special cat and his last few years with you & Scott was probably the best years of his life. He's on Rainbow bridge with all the other dogs and cats chasing & teasing each other. God bless his soul.
~Aunt Char

Anonymous said...

Mom and I are feeling the pain of your loss. Tolly brought joy to the thousands he entertained at Sea World. Both you and Scott gave Tolly joy and love upon adopting him. His life was made better because of you two. Hang in there. Dad

Anonymous said...

Even though it's been days since we found out, I am still so very sad about Tolly's passing. He was such a darling cat, and I know he meant so much to both you and Scott. Love you. Summ